Alien No More

Nov. 28, 2009. 8:22 AM

This is my all-time favorite picture of my Roand. Taken 9 hours after he was born. See how he doesn't look like an alien now? He looks so...soft, so handsome, so innocent. He smelled of the freshest most innocent sweet scent that I wish I could keep in a bottle. I would stare at him then and smell him and stare at him. And fall in love with him. I didn't want to kiss him yet then, or carry him. I just wanted to stare at him. He looked so peaceful that I was scared I'd disturb that. He looked so peaceful I almost forgot the pain I went through in bringing him out to this world. And so I just watched him. And as I did, I felt all sorts of emotions that I can't explain. I felt overwhelmed with love and happiness, at the same time I was sad that his father couldn't see what I was seeing then. I felt scared. I suddenly felt unsure. I felt worried. Of what? I wasn't sure. But looking at him, something seemed to wash away all my worries and questions. Then I was left with feelings of extreme happiness, pride and love.

That day, I felt I was born too. I felt anew. I felt I was given a second chance to make things right. This  tiny new life gave me a new one back.